who needs sleep?

Aargh. Moses won't sleep.

He's so cute, standing in his crib in his Buzz Lightyear pajamas. He wants us to come in and snuggle with him. Again. For the fourth time. He isn't crying. But I know he is standing there, tilting his head at an angle, shifting from foot to foot, wanting us to come back in the room. I don't know what to do.

Bobby and I played with him on the bed for a long, long time tonight. It's like he's trying to soak up all the love he missed as an infant. He grabs our noses and turns our faces left and right so he can kiss us on each cheek. He does this over and over again. Then he will grab our hands and pull them into his chest and tuck them under his arm like a little kid holding a teddy bear. It's a very possessive thing, like he is saying, "You are MINE!"

Every once in a while, he will do some repetitive self-rocking, or hitting his head on the mattress. His actions are much milder than a lot of the other kids, but he still does it a little bit. I think it has to do with sensory input. This is very normal for an institutionalized child who has had to comfort himself at night. He didn't have a mom or dad to pat his back or rock him, so he had to get that motion and pressure fulfilled in his own way.

When we hold him on the bed, he will do this a little, then reach for us. It's very interesting. It's like he's trying to replace his old patterns with new ones. He is incredibly sweet about it. You can almost feel the gaps in his heart filling up as he pulls us into his world.

But I need him to sleep now. It's almost eleven o'clock, and I don't want him to get sick from fatigue.

Tonight was fun. JD and Moses played swords with empty Coke bottles. Whack. Whack. Whack. (Boy language for, "I love you, man." We taught Moses how to give an exploding fist five. And, we shared a couple of yummy discoveries from a local bakery. Also, I opened a bag of Jelly Belly's I brought from home, which I'm eating in the dark right now. NOT a good idea. Who in the world thought it was a good idea to make coffee or popcorn flavored jelly beans? Now that's just gross.

An hour or two ago, Clara tucked Moses in bed and sang to him for a long time while rubbing his back. It was so sweet to hear that. Bobby and I tucked him in a time or two after that. No wonder he doesn't want to sleep, huh? Apparently one problem with adopting a child seven years younger than the baby of the family is that EVERYONE wants to spoil him. What a mess.

Well, I'm going to try to get some sleep. I hope Moses will soon, too...

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About This Blog

Welcome to our family’s adoption journey. As you read, you will see us stumble and take wrong paths. You will see our hopes surge and fall. You will see the gaps in our humanity, and how our God realigns us to His purposes over and again. We think the messiness of this process is important. Sometimes walking with God isn’t a neat, linear package that can be summarized in bullet points. More often, life ebbs and flows around our plans, while God works His sovereign wonders from it all. We are learning so much through this journey. And we are super excited about our new son. If you’d like to join us, we’d love to have you along for the ride.

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