The Checklist

Well, I checked some bubbles. But I think we’re going to have to redo it.

Part of the special needs adoption process involves a long checklist with different physical and mental issues. Prospective parents must read through that list and decide yes, no, or maybe.

How do you look at a page full of special needs and decide which conditions you would accept in your child? There’s a huge part of me that wants to just check, “YES,” on all of them, even though some of them frighten me.

I’m fairly comfortable with ASD or VSD, because our birth daughter had an ASD. And I’m comfortable with club foot, because my husband had one. I’m comfortable with cleft lip and palate, because my niece had that.” I also have a dear friend who has a missing finger, another with spina bifida, and on... and on... and on...

What it comes down to is, I COULD love any child on that checklist.

After agonizing for quite a while, I read something online that was helpful. It said to think about which special needs your family could care for best. And it hit me that if we signed up for a child with extreme, long-term needs, our attempts at “love” might prevent someone with better resources from caring for her.

So, I’ll have to think some more. And pray. And ask God which needs we can meet in light of our boundaries. Please pray that we’ll have wisdom there.

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About This Blog

Welcome to our family’s adoption journey. As you read, you will see us stumble and take wrong paths. You will see our hopes surge and fall. You will see the gaps in our humanity, and how our God realigns us to His purposes over and again. We think the messiness of this process is important. Sometimes walking with God isn’t a neat, linear package that can be summarized in bullet points. More often, life ebbs and flows around our plans, while God works His sovereign wonders from it all. We are learning so much through this journey. And we are super excited about our new son. If you’d like to join us, we’d love to have you along for the ride.

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